Judgement

The people who claim that there should not be any judgement, tend to be the greatest judges of them all. I am not even going into religion because that would just open up this massive can of worms that I really would not like to feast on at the moment.

What I do need to get out of my chest this morning, despite the gazillion things I actually need to be working on, is how people start to shun you away because you have changed into someone they do not respect or look up to anymore. And before one says, “maybe you are too sensitive”, action proves far more than little words of comfort that they try to provide you with. Truly. I can understand the whole logic behind FB being an absolute relationship destroyer, because people are contradicting themselves all the time, me included.

We say we are busy, and yet we find time to comment, like, and do all sorts of other things on the social media, instead of actually doing other things that matter more, like working, or actually having a decent conversation with someone, for example.

In the last two years, I have learnt so much about the judgement of people against lesbians (or LGBTs in general). And as a friend has said it to me before, “you guys just make it like such a big deal”. But how can we not, when discrimination and judgement is still seen all over? And to be one who’s experienced it first hand, not only by strangers, but also by her own family members, the hurt cuts real deep. And that is the truth. Unconditional love is something that maybe a handful is capable of in this world. Yes, only a handful, because when you think about unconditional love, you think about far more than just loving the person, you think about loving them despite your beliefs, despite who you were expecting them to be, despite who they have become.

Humans unfortunately see people the way they want to see them, not the way these people actually are. There is a huge difference. And this unconscious or subconscious judgement, is what kills.

We say we don’t judge. But truth is, all of us do, in our own way. And when you say you accept a person for who they are, please think twice before you say it because you are leading the person on to think you see them or who they are, not who you expect or want them to be.

Unspoken judgement within inevitably breeds hypocrisy.

 

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